Before we dig deeper into this topic, I would like to point out that I’m not giving direct instructions or advising what decision you should make in this situation. God knows your heart and your marriage better than anyone. Therefore, I encourage you to take this information, meditate on it, and pray over it.
This topic is very close to my heart because it is a part of my testimony. After praying for guidance on how to approach this subject due to my personal experience, I was given this to share.
I believe most of us don’t go into marriage thinking about our spouse going through a drastic change in personality or lifestyle. We usually are content with who we have chosen at that moment. However, we as Christians know that we become new creatures and our lives can change rather quickly. The way we think, the way we dress, and even the way we speak can change. Although fellow brothers and sisters rejoice over your new heart, this experience can be perceived very differently from your spouse if they don’t share your faith.
Recognize that people find themselves in situations such as this one for a variety of reasons. This could include people’s selfish desires to marry who they want against God’s will, or even marrying someone who claimed to be a Christian that later on decided to not follow God. In many cases, people get married for money, lust, and even social status. Regardless of this, God will call His chosen ones, amid their failing marriage, and use them for His Glory.
Choosing to follow Christ while being married to a nonbeliever is not an easy task. Fortunately, we know that with God nothing is impossible. This doesn’t mean that we won’t struggle, or that we will stay married to that person. Instead of dwelling on such thoughts, I encourage you to surrender your marriage to God and allow Him to guide you and give you peace.
The following verse speaks directly to this topic. Rest assured that in the storm, the Lord doesn’t want you to worry, but instead wants His peace to abide in you.
“12 To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her.13 If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him.14 For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise, your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.15 But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases, the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.” 1 Corinthians 7:12-15
I encourage you to shift your focus. Instead of stressing yourself over what your next move should be, or whether or not you should stay with that person, focus on God. Pray daily for Him to do His will in your life and your marriage. Remember, it’s not about us or about what we want, but the ultimate goal is to serve our Almighty God who has been so gracious to us. Be joyful. Make Him first in everything you do and you shall find peace.
Written by Gabriela Cesarino
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